Installment #2 of "Things We Make Fun of"

I'm sure you've all been on the edge of your seats since my 1st post.
Or maybe you're still laughing about the first post, "Lovin' at Stony Creek", and you're not ready for #2.
Anyway, the topic of my second post took place on our honeymoon. During our stay on the island of Aitutaki, we took a lagoon cruise. We spent a day being taken to all the best snorkeling spots in the lagoon surrounding the island. We found some amazing tropical fish and corals, and, yes folks, some humor that has stayed with us through almost 5 years of marriage.

"THE LEGEND OF CAPTAIN SEA CUCUMBER"

This is a sea cucumber. I'll admit, they aren't pretty. They were scattered in the shallow water on the shore of the lagoon. Trust me, the rest of the island was so breathtaking, they really didn't bother me. I was curious one day and actually did bring myself to touch one...it kinda felt like a plastic bag with water in it. They don't move (very quickly at least). They are kinda like the slugs of the sea, if you ask me. The natives rip them open and eat their insides...they call this "spaghetti", so if you order spaghetti the next time you're in the South Pacific, make sure you're really getting what you want. (I never did see it on a menu, though). Apparently you can rip these things open, throw the skin back in the ocean and little sea cucumber will regenerate, kinda like if you chop a worm in half. I'll stop. The details are kinda irrelevant to the story...what is relevant to the story is what these things look like. If you can't tell from the picture, they are about the size of a banana.
On said lagoon cruise, most of the other people we met were honeymooners like ourselves or older couples celebrating anniversaries. There were a few single guys...one of these guys never put sunblock on the WHOLE DAY. He was scheduled to fly home right after the cruise...I'm fairly confident that he was burned so badly that his skin probably fell off mid-flight in an X Files-esque happening. We still joke about that guy...but it wasn't funny enough to earn it's own post.
The other single guy...
We have no idea what the dude's name was...but we will never forget that LIGHT BLUE SPEEDO. Ok....it was actually a light blue pair of "euro shorts" (i think that's what they are called). Picture a guy wearing boy shorts...ok....yeah, we do call them "boy shorts", so a guy wearing them should be normal...in America, it's NOT the norm...so we found it irresistibly FUNNY (and...yikes...tight).
So...I told you about sea cucumbers.....and I told you about dude's bathing suit...I'll let you do the math.
If you hang out with Tim and I on the beach and a speedo is your style, don't feel bad...we can love you just the way you are...but don't cry if we call you Captain Sea Cucumber!