I Remeber...Haunted Houses

Somewhere around junior high, I developed a fascination with scary things. I remember riding my bike a mile or so to the local library to check out R.L. Stine books. My mom and I took turns scaring each other by hiding a rubber rat and mask. My cousin and I would spend hours decorating her living room with as many Halloween decorations as we could afford from Rite Aid with our allowances. I remember one time we even threw a Halloween sleepover at her house. And, of course, we began renting scary movies!
Once my cousin and I got a little older, we began seeking out the local haunted attractions. When October rolled around, we would hit up the local Taco Bell for a Fear Finder newspaper. We'd pour over the paper searching for which haunted attraction we'd attend that year. I think mostly we made our decision based on which were the closest and offered a coupon...but hey, we felt adventurous. I remember we attended a few haunted hayrides and once we even ventured into a legitimately scary haunted house attraction. I spent most of the time hanging on to my cousin and her friend for dear life.
I guess I was a chicken-turned-scare-lover-wannabe.
Yesterday at the cider mill, I spotted a stack of Fear Finder papers and I couldn't resist bringing one home. I read it today with the fervor that some women read Cosmo. It seems to me that the haunted house industry has expanded both in number and in scariness! I had to type this during the day lest some of the images in the paper keep me awake. Here are some of the most memorable haunted attraction names (in my expert opinion):

Wrong Turn Campground and Bloody Butcher House
The Hellevator
Saint Lucifer's Haunted Asylum (seriously, save your money...the ad is scary enough)
Haunted Winery (this one caught my eye ;) )

The neatest thing I learned while reading this paper? There will be a MASS WEDDING PERFORMED BY WOLFMAN AT THE EREBUS HAUNTED HOUSE ON HALLOWEEN. Yes, there is actually a guy who dresses up as wolf man and is legally able to marry you. Wow.

Some of the scariest claims made by various ads:
"We put terror in your face!"
"Over 70 live executioners, zombies, victims, and a lot of dead things!"

I guess gas and grocery prices and a trillion dollar war aren't scary enough for some people...because they are paying in upwards of $20 for this stuff.
It's (minorly) tempting to (attempt) to hit up one of these haunted attractions with Tim. I think that fall is innately spooky...it gets darker earlier, all our beautiful summer foliage dies, and that good old chill returns to the air. I look forward to seeing kids dressed up and trick-or-treating. I know not everyone believes that there should be a holiday that celebrates being scared...but there is still this kid in me that wants to embrace that! But, lets face it...I'm still just a chicken-turned-scare-lover-wannabe. I would spend $15 or $20 just to dig my nails into Tim's arm and bury my head into his shoulder while simultaneously causing him hearing damage with my screams.

1 comment:

Barb said...

When we moved to florida Last year we kept hearing about how Universal did Halloween somthing like 20 haunted houses and shows also so we went last year It was fun but I do not think I will go back not because it was to scarry but just because I am not into that much check out the web site http://www.halloweenhorrornights.com/orlando/index.html this is for this year